Songwriting Class

Did I tell you I’m teaching Songwriting Workshops? I finished one yesterday and know this is something I love to do. These workshops aren’t just about writing songs. They really are about diving inside yourself to find your authentic voice. I really believe that it’s most important that folks strive to find and nurture their authentic selves. That they love what they do and create their personal vision before anyone else’s opinion.

The Artist Way is such a good book for teaching this and more. I swear I’ve purchased that book over 15 times only to give it away because I find someone who, I think, really needs it. It it, Julie Cameron talks so much about protecting your artist so that you can foster your particular vision. I think people need that everywhere in their lives.

I love the profound idea of how unique each person is. There is only one of you. There will only be one of you, ever. What unique thing will you bring out? Are you going to deny the world what only you and show us? That would be a shame.

I started a coaching/mentoring/teaching business because I think one unique thing I bring to planet earth is the desire and ability to empower people. I want you to be everything you wan to be. If we only have one time on this planet (if you believe that), then what the hell are we wasting time on denying sharing/doing/being who you are authentically meant to be?

If you want like to be ranted at, more like this, I have another Songwriting Workshop on Dec 9th at Feast Arts Center (cost:$40). It runs from 1-5pm – tickets up soon. This class is for anyone! Even if you haven’t ever written a song. We focus mostly on lyrics/themes/words and move into, if we have time, performance/melody – share a song, please if you like.

http://www.feastarts.com/

For information on having a one/one coaching session – check out my website! Please spread the word to anyone you feel could use the support and love it!

https://www.carrieakrecreative.com/

Happy Daylight Savings – a crud I lost an hour!!! Still dark out!

Big love to you all!

Carrie

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Panic Day

Some days I’m just not feeling it. I’m in the pocket with new ideas and belief and energy to move on it. Today not so much…then I panic cause I want things done and solid.

Fear crept in and is messing with my foundation. I’m in that place where there are a lot of ideas I have on things I like to do and then there are the bills to pay. I’ve been listening to so many self-help books and no one talks, at length, about the time in the middle before success. I mean in detail. The minutia of how you doubt and flail daily sometimes. I want to hear what that feels like and what they did to move forward.

I think it’s just in the doing and I won’t quite know till I’m there. That ain’t easy.

Just keep swimming, just keep swimming…

Here are the things I will do and the garbage flying around these ideas:

Blog/Write – don’t know what that will lead to but I’m ok with mystery for now.

Record – when, what should it sound like, who will play on it, how will I pay for it? I’m over whelmed a bit

Teach – doing my songwriting classes and will write down all that comes to me that I think will help anyone wanting to write. This class is also just about building a strong self foundation to get any answer on anything

Retreats – I’d like to create my own band/songwriter retreat to deep dive/work hard with a group and teach

DON’T FALL APART – Deep breathe and don’t dive into a ton of wine and food. Be here now is one of my pieces of work right now.

Perform – UGH, I mean yeah? I’m doing some of it but it’s fall/winter and I need to deep dive after November and go within!

Get a job to help pay for it – ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Welcome to my mind! I’m sure I’m not alone. I’m off to take my son to work and hang with a kid who repeatedly asks if I’m pregnant and why am I fat. Yeah that feels great.

 

Carrie

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Fall 2017 – More Blogging

I’ve decided to blog more. This open diary as a potential connection to other people, interests me. The potential, the mysterious possibility is exciting to me. It has crossed my mind this is narcissistic and that’s one way to look at it. But I am looking at it like tossing some thoughts into the air and seeing if anyone is interested. If not that is ok as well. Here’s to the mystery.

The Fall is here and I’m really missing my mom. What I feel stronger than ever is the vacancy of her in particular. It makes me appreciate the singular specialness of one person. I miss talking to her, sharing this life on the planet together. To me, she was a pillar, wise, comfortable, smart, stable, loving, life connected person in my life. She made me and was there for all of my life. A pillar has been removed from my life and I am empty in places. It would be so much nicer in so many ways if she were still here. But she’s not, so how do I become whole?

I’m doing much better than, say, two years ago. I am reaching deeper into the understanding that I am the only one who can shape my future. I’m more ready to do that now than, say two years ago. Yeah for that.

A couple of things I think I understand.

  1. The present is all that matters but it’s a bitch to not drift deeply into the past or future.
  2. I dive into the past out of bad habit.
  3. I drive into the future because I think that is how I take care of things and protect myself. Prepared for anything, right? Ha
  4. I am the only one who make decisions about what I do.
  5. Beware of assuming – fear – assumptions are just stories you’re making up that are not true and you def don’t know they are true. You’re just living by them in order to feel safe. Plus you know the saying: what does assuming do? Makes an ass out of you and me..ok you’ve hear that already.
  6. Beware of projecting – your crap onto others… don’t do it.
  7. I know I am meant to do something renegade and that not knowing all the info is driving me nuts (control!!). I have a few pieces of the picture. Teaching empowerment, writing/recording/performing music, podcasting, blogging, reading, dancing, meditating, yoga, teaching yoga (gentle yoga/mindfulness) and travel.
  8. I think I just have to start doing. IT’s in the doing. I’ll just have to see what it reveals.
  9. This is hard! Ok, now I feel like I sound like a cry baby.

My mom used to say, “Thank God you’re not your own mother”. I am a little hard on myself…now even my husband notices and says so. Well I’ll have to work on that. In the mean time sailors let’s drift on and see what happens.

If you feel like this spoke to you, please, pass it on. I’m not going to Facebook/Twitter/Instagram promote this cause I’m sick of that.

I’d like to just see what happens. Mystery

Big love to all!

Carrie

 

 

 

 

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What Should I Do?

Here’s the question I have been asking myself. What is my natural path? I am capable of many things. I can do a lot of things well. But what is my true nature and what does it need? Our culture says to go go go, be the best, strive for things. But is that the right thing? Or do each of us have a true nature that we need to nurture and let go of these outside expectations? You tell me.

I was thinking back to high school when I played tennis and I remember that I was pretty damn good at it but I would always hit a wall when I started to really succeed and I would back off. Why? Was it that I didn’t think I deserved to be at the top? Something about it scared me or touched an empty spot in my person. Like a realm I wasn’t allowed to go into or didn’t have the self-esteem to forge into. I’m wondering why? How does that play out in my life today?

This also played out in music in ways I thought about myself. Most everybody doesn’t know that but I do. Offers were made that I turned down. And internal shyness was present that I would battle but nobody else would know. Not knowing how to singularly push a full vision of mine. A strength missing. I’m working on recovering myself and finally playing out a deeper true vision hopefully but I am finding this wall again.

I know things are different as an adult. Things have happened, sorrow is carried, memories stick around and its still time to be new again and I don’t find that easy.

I miss the day when I was a kid and none of these burdensome pile of thoughts was on me. Is that the state I should head back to? This is such new territory.
Looking at this post I know and can see that I’m not being very grateful for what is awesome. So maybe I turn my eyes on that.

I love my son, my husband, summertime, friends, coaching, yoga teaching, music and books and hell his blog.

Somebody chime in and tell me how you’re doing.

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Did I go?…

NO! I did not go to those interviews.

Can you believe it? I sweated over that email. Looked at my computer forever. Then pressed send. I decided that now is that time to go with my gut. Trust.

I think I’ve been mentioning and leading up to this change that requires me to truly follow my gut. I’ve talked to so many others who have hit this spot where they new change was required, risk was needed, faith was a must. That is me now.

I am in the river of change and I’ll be teaching and working with others, (Workshop to come to http://www.samdhanakaranayoga.org/) all together as we navigate to our futures that are based on authenticity, facing fear and trusting our intuition/gut decisions.

ALSO: I remember me, my favorite me. I’ve seen photos of her in her flaming red hair, swinging a microphone. I remember the fire burn in my lungs as I tried to sing, run around, sweat and live loudly in front of few and sometimes many! I liked that me. I am still that person.

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I am more now. I am older, wiser, carved out, a mother, wife, a healer, singer, artist, friend and seeker. I am morphing and referring back to who I really am at the same time.

I will be teaching, gathering a band together, travelling, playing music, reading a ton, taking classes, finding you all here as well…I hope so much.

Just a note for today. I haven’t said before but if this blog helps you please share it and spread the word. I like doing this and want to spread out to as many as I can find and see what happens. Thank you!

So determined to create and here is how I’m doing that for now:

Shows:

Danny and Carrie house shows – T-shirts/stickers too!!
May 19th – Sleight of Hand Tasting Room – Walla Walla
May 20th – House Show – KennewickMore in June
https://www.facebook.com/CarrieAkreDannyNewcomb/

Danny Newcomb – Record Release – 6/3 – I’m opening
https://www.facebook.com/DannyNewcombMusic/?fref=nf&pnref=story.unseen-

Goodness LP GoFundMe: https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/goodness-first-album-on-vinyl-music#/

Carrie Akre Creative – Coaching – Book a Session
https://www.facebook.com/carrieakrecreative/

Carrie Akre – music – new EP and show to come!

I luvs ya! Live well! Be kind! Be nice/compassionate to you own damn self too!

Carrie

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Just So You know I’m Not Perfect

Just so you don’t think I’ve got this all figured out. I have been waffling, rationalizing, second guessing and hedging. Have I canceled those interviews I mentioned? No! I’ve been doing circular conversations with myself and my husband since my last post.

Here are the conversations in my head:
1. I’ll just go and not care.
2. I could do the work and then quit when i want.
3. It won’t suck the life out of me cause I won’t let it.
4. I’ll make sure I’m doing all the other real work I want to do as well. That includes: yoga, writing, coaching, promoting coaching, workshops, working out, cooking, hanging with my son, hanging with my husband, playing music, writing music, podcasting and blogging. Yeah I’ll just fit that in nicely around a 40hr work week…I’m nuts.

See where I am? I just wanted to write and show anyone who needs to see that these changes aren’t always done in straight line. I am on the edge of trying to trust that money will show up, I’ll know what I’m doing, clients will show up, this new business of coaching will grow.

Right now my stress is just momentarily about money. One or two months of unsureness. But bigger than that is needed this trust that if I walk off the cliff the universe will meet me. I could use a hug! Feel free to leave one here.

For anyone in the same place as me, know that I am in it! I am right here in it with you. Come have a session together on it. www.carrieakrecreative.com

Am I going to cancel the interviews for Wednesday? I don’t know right this minute.

Stay tuned…

Carrie
www.carrieakrecreative.com
facebook.com/carrieakrecreative
carrie.akre@outlook.com

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Leap of Faith

Hi Gang!

I am not a straight forward religious person. I do believe in God but I may also call it the Universe, Source, Higher Power… yest I’m that gal. Always have been. This week I’ve really had to actively work or participate in trusting that upper source of trust and strength by taking a total leap of faith.

I have been feeling for a long time that I really never totally belonged in the corporate world. It’s gotten me money, taken me places and even brought some beautiful people into my life but I have NEVER felt at home. I just don’t have the desire to climb ladders or base my worth on producing things for companies. Remember I spent my 20s being a self sustaining artist so it’s really hard to reign it in enough to care about what becomes SOOO serious in work places. Here no disrespect to all the amazing intelligent, talented and hard working folks I have worked with. But sometimes office politics and the culture imposed is bullshit. Straight up unreal and not worth diminishing your self worth over.
(can you tell I’ve been bitten/hurt before by this!) Ok onward…

Back to my real point. I truly believe that I am meant, am already, a healer. I’ve been feeling it in my heart for so long but couldn’t define it, what that feeling was or hadn’t quite put it into words. I believe I’ve been doing that already through music, but now will also through coaching, teaching kids and adults, songwriting and creative empowerment workshops, yoga and yes through music! I can share my wish to help people break through fear, do what they want to, and help them find and feel good about who their authentic selves are in this world and lifetime.

So here was my leap. I left my last job in the digital world in January. I’d saved money to supplement that income loss and have been para educating in the public school system and teaching at a Theater/Arts school. Some of teaching I love, some of it…not so much but whatever. I’m running out of money… so I panicked and applied but tech work, got the phone interview and now the in person. And you know what? I’ve been dreading it the whole time. Bad gut feeling That is no way to live.

FAITH LEAP: So I’m walking away from the interview. I’m staying the course of my gut/faith. I will figure it out!

I pause here and say I know to those who struggle for work or are having a hard time with getting hired, this may seem massively ridiculous and self indulgent and privileged. I can see that side. Just trust me that I know this and also believe that it takes courage, smarts and for good reasons I must carve out a life, if I can, that I love or I will slowly erode. I think that is true for anyone who is living/working a life that isn’t authentic.

What I really want and am starting to do is life/creative coach, teach, heal people, help people, workshop, blog, vlog, podcast etc…yes play music. I’m taking yoga teacher training (I graduate in June!)…I’m building this new world! Dammit I’m doing this. I have some many great friends and examples of people doing the same. I’m going to follow suite and make my tribe!

Come check out the beginnings of my new work at:
http://www.carrieakrecreative.com – want a session? Book on this site!
https://www.facebook.com/carrieakrecreative/
https://www.facebook.com/CarrieAkreDannyNewcomb/?ref=bookmarks – MORE SHOWS IN MAY

Over and upward!
Thanks for reading!
Spread the word!

PS: if you are struggles with career, job, life path questions! Come see me!!!!

Love you,
Carrie

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